


After The Fall Came The Landing

by WhatsaBex



Category: MacGyver (TV 2016)
Genre: 5x05 inspired, Crying, F/M, Hurt, Jack Dies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-17 02:42:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28717473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhatsaBex/pseuds/WhatsaBex
Summary: Jack Dalton is dead and the news hits Riley and Mac the most.Riley tries to grieve alone until she faces Jack left a goodbye video for her and Mac.
Relationships: Jack Dalton & Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016), Jack Dalton (MacGyver TV 2016) & Riley Davis, Riley Davis & Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016)
Comments: 13
Kudos: 67





	After The Fall Came The Landing

**Author's Note:**

> I know I should be finishing my other fic but after the synopsis that we got for 5x05 most of us freaked out about Jack possibly dying. As the show is not doing too well in the grieving department, I feel we won't get to see many too emotional scenes.  
> However, I feel Jack Dalton deserves it! Losing him would be (and will be) a terrible loss and I am already crying so I had to give him a nice good bye scene and the needed comfort and grieving for Riley and Mac.
> 
> Don't hate me too much, but I wrote the whole thing while crying so you can imagine it's pretty emotional.
> 
> But if you want to blame someone blame CassieJohnson05 for writing I've Got You.

**After the fall came the landing...**

Once when I was younger I fell down from a tree. It wasn’t that high, so I wasn’t badly injured. But I’ll always remember how it felt to land on the ground. As if time has stopped and reality was gone for a second. All I could do was lie there stare at the sky. Sometimes when I panicked in my life I still had that moment of landing: the force of the impact still resonating in my body, for a split second every bit of oxygen left me breathless. And then like when you press play on a paused video everything starts up again, the voices reach your ear, you can see the clouds move in the sky. And then the pain hits you. 

This time I didn’t fall from any tree. I was trying to live my life without anyone seeing how lost I was most of the time. I focused on my work, went home, and tried not to think about how lonely I was. And just like that came the news that he was gone. Getting the news was like being pushed from that tree… but seeing the funeral, knowing for a fact that he was never coming back to me… it was the hrd landing. 

As people slowly left us murmuring their sorrows to me, I couldn’t bring myself to look up. The whole world was muted, every person who talked to me was faceless. People came by and left it could have been hours or second only, I felt no difference anymore. In my mind I was lying on my back staring at the sky, breathless. I knew it was just a matter of time before reality hit and I had to be alone. I had to be away from all the prying eyes that included Bozer, Matty and especially Mac. 

“Hey, you alright, Riles?” he came up to me. His voice reached me like I was underwater: echoing, distorted and barely understandable. I looked up to see him stand in front of me. His eyes were full of pain and a part of me knew how much he must have been hurting. But then I saw his hands intertwined with Desi’s and a remorseful thought filled my mind: _Well, at least he had Desi he’ll be fine! But who did I have?_ It wasn’t a nice thought of mine and I immediately tried to forget about it. 

“Yes,” my own voice sounded like the most alien thing I have ever heard. “I just need some time alone.” I said and with that I started moving further from them. I could have sworn I saw Mac move or maybe even said something but I had no will to make anything out of it. It felt like everything slowly started losing its meaning and importance. What was the point of always saving everyone if I couldn’t save the ones I loved the most? 

For the next couple of days I was patiently waiting for the shock of my landing to be over. I knew it was coming but I couldn’t know how long my life will be frozen and muted. I heard people come over and knock on my door but I never opened it to anyone. I wasn’t sure if I even moved from the couch after arriving home, taking a shower and sitting down with Jack’s favourite bottle of scotch. I couldn’t even tell if I was still breathing or if my heart was still beating because there was this hole in my chest that was slowly pressing me like a heavy weight, waiting for the right moment to crush me. 

That’s when I got Matty’s text to meet at the war room. If she didn’t write the ‘ _It’s about Jack’_ part to it I wouldn’t have even bothered to respond let alone go. Whatever it was I had to know. Every and each movement I made felt like I was in slow-motion, even when I blinked. My reflection in the mirror looked nothing like I usually did: I was a mess even though I couldn't even cry. I was still while the world moved on. 

I didn’t even know how I got to the Phoenix, or if anyone talked to me. I was just moving with the simple suggestions that Jack gave me after my fall: _there you go, okay you are back on your feet now left, right, left right… you can do it._ Except I couldn’t do it. Back then I felt his hands strongly holding my arm when he got me up from the ground. Now I felt nothing. And it was worse than any pain ever. 

“Riley, thank you for coming,” Matty greeted me sadly. It was only her and Mac in the room. He didn’t look much better than I did. His eyes were a bit puffy so I could tell he finally found it in himself to let it all out. I couldn’t even do that. He took one step forward as if he wanted to hug me but I purposely went into the other direction: it was my misery I had to keep it to myself, find my own strength to get through. He already had his shoulder to cry on. “I got this the other day from one of Jack’s friends who was with him during… You know.” I could barely see Matty anything else but intimidating but right now she seemed broken. Even the strongest of us cannot bear such a heavy weight… what was I supposed to then? She pushed a button on the screen behind her and suddenly my reality started playing too. 

“Hey, guys!” I heard Jack’s voice. This was the first sound that reached me since we got the news. The way how everything that was muted before changed back to its normal self was overwhelming. Matty’s quiet sobbing, Mac fidgeting with a paperclip: everything was too loud. But not Jack. 

“It’s been a while, I know, sorry for that. Look what I have,” he showed his shoulder which had a huge bandage on and smiled into the camera. I could have sworn I heard a crashing sound as one bit of my heart broke. “I got a pretty close call the other day… The doc says I got lucky but I have to admit I was scared. You know when I left I was hoping to get back to you in a year but I think we all knew it was going to take a long time. But when I woke up in the hospital I realized it may not be a when but rather an if question. I know I left in a hurry and I am sorry about that now. But I guess this is better, at least you can’t talk back to me,” he laughed at himself and I felt another piece of my heart breaking. “Mac. You do know that I always thought about you as my brother, a sometimes very annoying but incredibly good brother. I cannot count how many times you have saved my life and that makes me feel guilty: I should be there with you. I always thought I’ll have my final shot while saving your life and it would have been the biggest honor. Maybe one day I will, I cannot know. But in case I don’t get to see you again: I love you, brother, with all my heart and I just hope you know that no matter what you had been through you have our family. Don’t forget that!”

Hearing Mac sobbing was worse than being shot but I couldn’t bring myself to move and hug him. I couldn’t even take my eyes off of the screen. I already felt guilty for not remembering every inch of Jack’s face so now I kept my focus on how his eyes were in tears but he still tried to look strong, or how he smiled when he talked, how he uttered my name.

“Riley, my Riley…” 

And there it was. Reality hit, first the sound were back but now I could feel the pain run through my whole body, I was breathless and grief kept sitting on my chest forcing me to feel. 

“I didn’t do many things in my life I could really be proud of. But being a part of your life, seeing you find your path and become this amazing woman! I know I already said it but I want you to remember these words every single day you wake up: I am so proud of you, honey! You have such a big heart full of kindness even though you have been through so much and I know you don’t want others to see it but I always knew that there is no one who could be more selfless than you. But you have to promise me something: you won’t always hide behind your computer. You deserve to be happy and deserve someone who makes you feel whole and safe all the time. Don’t settle for anything less. Whenever you meet someone just think of what the old Jack would say about him, if he would approve or kick his ass. And you bet I will kick ass on the other side too,” he laughed, while I felt every little drop of my strength leave me on my own, vulnerable to the heartbreak that slowly tore me apart. “I don’t regret much but I know I messed up every relationship I ever had so I could never really get to think of having kids. But, Riley, whatever happens: you are not just like a daughter to me but you _are_ _my_ daughter and I want my last thoughts to be filled with all the times I could make you smile, when you hugged me, how you made me feel like I could be a father even if I never got my chance. You don’t know how much I needed you in my life, but I want you to know you are the reason I can die in peace because loving you and knowing you love me too is the best thing that ever happened to me. You made me the happiest man, and I hope one day a lucky bastard gets to feel this. On that day I’ll be either on your side walking you down the aisle or I’ll be watching you above with all the love of the world, my sweet girl!”

I have landed. I was now on the ground with my heart in a thousand pieces scattered around the floor. I felt my chest tighten with every breathe that felt my lungs. Hands reached out to me, tightly grabbing me and for a second my mind played me. I have made myself believe Jack was there again, just like the last, saving me saying I can do this just one step at a time. But he wasn’t. Mac’s blue eyes searched mine before hugging me so tightly I could feel his heartbeat. At least his was still beating. My body trembled with every wave of cries. 

“I have no one left,” I whispered the painful truth. 

“Hey, no, listen to me,” he cleared the hair out of my face to look me deep in the eye. “I am here, and I am not leaving, ever. You and me, we are a family, you heard it, I couldn’t leave you if I ever wanted to… I need you,” he looked at me, his eyes mirroring the same emotions that were crawling in me. I let him take me into his arms, whispering how we can do this together. “Just one day at a time,” he said, making let out another painful cry.

I was in pieces now but every word Mac whispered into my ear while holding me in his arms was like the pain left me drop by drop until I felt whole and safe, just as Jack wanted.


End file.
